help my unbelief

I soooo want to be able to live in complete trust and faith above any circumstances that come, as I have been being challenged to do.  I want to rest completely in Jesus' grip knowing that whatever comes, He is able and He is sovereign and nothing else matters.

Today, I am not that girl.  Today, I am like the man we talked about this morning in Mark 9 who brings his boy to Jesus to be healed.  He believes, yet his son has been afflicted from childhood and no one, not even the disciples, have been able to heal him.  He pleads with Jesus, "If you can..." and Jesus laughs (I believe) and replies "If I can? All things are possible to him who believes."  The father cries, "I do believe, help my unbelief!"

I am this man today.  The twelve inches between my head and my heart seem so far apart. I hear Jesus saying in that "Are you kidding me?" tone of Mark 9, 'don't you remember all I've brought you through?  Do you not remember how I've provided before?'  

I do remember.   Indeed You are faithful.  What I know in my heart conflicts with what I see in my head.  Jesus, I need your eyes to color how I see my circumstances.  Lord, I believe, help my unbelief.

Come, every soul by sin oppressed, there's mercy with the Lord;
and he will surely give you rest, by trusting in his Word.
Only trust him, only trust him, only trust him now.
He will save you, he will save you, he will save you now.

Pass me not, O gentle Savior, Hear my humble cry;
While on others Thou art calling, Do not pass me by.

Savior, Savior, Hear my humble cry,
While on others Thou are calling, Do not pass me by.

Let me at a throne of mercy Find a sweet relief;
Kneeling there in deep contrition, Help my unbelief.

Savior, Savior, Hear my humble cry,
While on others Thou are calling, Do not pass me by.